DADS READ: “Extra Yarn” by author Mac Barnett and illustrator Jon Klassen

 

JER: “Extra Yarn” by author Mac Barnett and illustrator Jon Klassen begins with Annabelle finding a “box filled with yarn of every color”, and no matter how many sweaters she knits there is always “extra yarn”.  Everyone seems happier in their new sweaters, especially “little Louis”.  I’d like to think I would prefer a hat like Mr. Crabtree “who never wore sweaters or even long pants, and who would stand in his shorts with snow up to his knees”.

Setting the magical reality of children's books aside, there is good reason to believe that it might not be the "yarn" that is in endless supply, since it is a physical material.  The law of conservation of mass states that mass in an isolated system is neither "created nor destroyed by chemical reactions or physical transformations" (Antoine Lavoisier) and "total mass and energy in a system remain constant" (Albert Einstein).  Yarn wouldn't endlessly originate from a box without violating the conservation of mass and conservation of energy.  

In the book, the yarn is associated with happiness and change.  Perhaps it is also a metaphor for optimism.  But amid the doldrums of a pandemic, growing income inequality, and an escalating climate catastrophe, the concept of eternal optimism accompanied with the common advice of "think positive thoughts", "eat better", "keep a gratitude journal", etcetera feel like, for lack of a better word, BULLSHIT.  

The more I learn about moral psychology and biology, the less I believe humans are really in control of their individual choices.  

I was introduced to moral psychology by Jonathan Haidt, who uses a very apt metaphor for the human mind - which is like a Rider perched atop a massive Elephant: 

"[O]ur emotional side is the Elephant and our rational side is the Rider.  The Rider is perched atop the Elephant, and appears to be in control but is many times smaller than the Elephant.  The Rider may be able to control the Elephant, at times, but a 13,000 pound Elephant will always be able to ultimately choose where the 100-200 pound Rider ends up going.  Sometimes the Rider loses control of the Elephant, but tries to rationalize how they could still be in control and how they "really wanted to go this direction anyway" (Insights from "The Righteous Mind" from 13 May 2019)

Haidt argues that humans have evolved a moral psychology that binds and blinds.  It binds us to our tribe, and blinds us from violating our tribes morals and customs.  It made me very introspective on my own motivations and reasoning.  

Human reasoning feels like an essential part of consciousness, but Biology, itself, also calls into question the concept of "free will".  I was introduced to this concept by Radiolab's "Revising the Fault Line" - which follows the story of "Kevin" (pseudonym used for privacy and sensitive nature of his story) who suffered from seizures and had part of his brain removed to prevent future seizures.  The brain surgery worked, but it also ended up removing the part of his brain that filtered behavior and controlled thoughts/actions - which calls into question the nature of "free will".  Most of the way through the podcast episode, Radiolab hosts' Jad Abumrad and Robert Krulwich ask Stanford Neurologist Robert Sapolsky if "free will is the biology that we don't understand yet".

"JAD: When -- do you in your heart, deep in the -- deep in the center of your, like, in the -- do you really believe this? Do you really think ...

ROBERT SAPOLSKY: Not for a second. Not for a second. And that's the whole thing. This is like my, like, huge conundrum. I have, like, zero belief in free will at this point, yet at the same time I cannot for a second imagine what the world is supposed to look like with people believing there is no free will. I don't know how to imagine it. And I'm constantly this hypocrite, I'm this terrible hypocrite because, like, I'll put on, like, my blue t-shirt instead of my gray t-shirt one morning, and later in the day someone will say, "Oh, whoa. Nice t-shirt." And I'll say, "Thanks." Oh my God, the hypocrisy of it! Here I am taking credit for it. In that circumstance I'm not able to stop and say, "Well actually, I have photoreceptors that, you know, because of this gene variant and that gene variant and my rhodopsin genes, so that I'm particularly good at noticing color sort of combinations, and thus I can get them matching." And "Oh, I picked the fresh fruit here because my olfactory receptors allow me to, like, be able to smell the pineapples that are fresh, and the luck of my socio-economic status has me in, like, some, like, organic market and gives me that, like, ability to do that while listening to, like, fake Peruvian muzak playing in the background, and --" No. You say -- when they say, "Oh, wow! You really know how to pick good pineapples," and I say, "Thanks!" Or when ...

JAD: [laughs]

ROBERT: [laughs] Doesn't this throw a little bit of shade on your intellectual side? I mean, if you believe that every behavior -- not just of Kevin's, because what you're really saying is that the deep lesson of the Kevin story is that everyone is a Kevin. All of us are Kevins all the time. And that anything we ...

ROBERT SAPOLSKY: For our worst and our best behaviors.

In view of this context, I wonder how much we are in control of our optimism.  I want to believe I can control my destiny and live a life of abundance.  There are plenty of people ready to proclaim that humans have free will and attract everything that happens to us.

"The Law of Attraction says that that which is like unto itself is drawn. In other words, that which you think, at any moment, attracts unto itself other thoughts that are like it." - Abraham Hicks

If you haven't heard of Abraham Hicks, it is a weird psychedelic trip to try and explain it. "Abraham" is a group of entities channeled by Esther Hicks who mostly focuses on the "Law of Attraction" - which is a sort of Direct Feedback Karma Free Will - where every event, problem, misfortune, blessing, good thing, bad thing, etcetera is within your power and drawn to you from your "source energy".  

The problem with that is there are ways in which people intrude upon other people's realities and prevent people from having a choice in what happens to their reality or body.  This video explores this very issue: victims of genocide, victims of trauma, etc. do not "attract" violence.  There has to be some boundaries to which a person can control their reality or what happens to them, and areas where things happen beyond a person's control or anyone's control.    

People in abusive relationships often try to maintain a sense of control by blaming themselves.  If they had only had the house more clean, if they had only made the right food, if they had only listened more, or done anything slightly different then there would not have been the abuse.  

In this very uncertain time, be careful that "gratitude or optimism shaming" doesn't make you feel worse about yourself.  I believe there is a range within which people can control their responses and behavior, but if too much stress, past trauma, or pressure is exerted on a person they may be virtually unable to respond positively.  

You may be able to gratitude journal your way out of a funk or mild depression, but you might not.  There is no shame in acknowledging biology.   Sometimes our brains need serious therapy and serious medicine.  There is growing evidence for ways to open or re-establish neural pathways.  Michael Pollen's new book "How to Change Your Mind" explores psychedelics.  MDMA (Ecstasy/Molly) has been proven as a "potential breakthrough treatment" for PTSD.  Psilocybin (Magic Mushrooms) has been been proven to be a faster and longer lasting treatment for depression than conventional anti-depressants.  Ketamine has been proven to treat depression and anxiety by increasing the amount of neurotransmitters, thus facilitating communication along new pathways for synaptogenesis.

I am not sure how to solve all the big problems, so for the time being I will do exactly what I am criticizing: Spread love, spread positivity, and cultivate optimism, BUT only if it is inspiring and encouraging to you.  Be sensitive to where you are at mentally and emotionally.  You may not be able to embrace love, positivity, or optimism right now, and that may not be your fault.  But I am sending good vibes out to everyone and everything, hopefully the colorful yarn will continue to flow into the world.