DADS READ: “When Sadness Is At Your Door” by Eva Eland

JER: “When Sadness Is At Your Door” by Eva Eland reminds me of one of my favorite children’s movie - “Inside Out” as it navigates emotions and the processing of them. 

As a child, I felt like I tried to suppress any feelings I was experiencing.  I think some cultural and religious expectations may have contributed to that, but for the most part I think I tried to suppress sadness based on my personal fear or shame.  As I’ve grown older, I’ve found that inviting emotions in and sitting with them can be a much healthier way to process.  I love the author/illustrator’s depiction of sadness as something that could be scary: “it arrives unexpectedly”, “it follows you around”, & “it sits so close to you, you can hardly breathe” to the point that “it feels like you’ve become sadness itself”. This is the “sadness monster” I tried to chase away and pack down when I was a kid.  But if you: “try not to be afraid of sadness.  Give it a name”, “just sit together and be quiet for a while”, “try letting it out sometimes” because “maybe all it wants to know is that it is welcome”. When I’ve taken the time to sit with my emotions, they can be sharp and painful, but I have emerged much healthier.  By contrast, suppressing my emotions has only led to them continually bubbling back up later.

Sitting with emotions gives lasting control.  Suppression gives the illusion of control.